Practical Stress Management

Stress. It seems to be everywhere doesn't it? It's hard to walk through life now a days without hearing about this topic. In some ways, most people seem to be stressed about something or other. What is it about western culture that has everyone so stressed out? This is what we will be diving into today. If we want to learn how to manage stress in our life we simultaneously need to acknowledge the potential stress inducers that are keeping us in a cyclical pattern of stress. At the end of the article I'll be giving you a few different activities to try which are aimed at relieving stress, as well as nutritional knowledge to help you heal your body from long term stress and prepare you body to more easily adapt to the inevitable life stresses to come.

How does stress show up in the body?

Stress is complex and it can be activated in numerous different ways. Stress is defined as any disturbance, therefor, it can arise when we burn our skin, if we are exposed to chemical toxins, physical traumas/accidents or strong emotional reactions. These stressors can be small and short lived such as the stress experienced when we get cut off in traffic on the way to work, while other stresses can be more intense and long term such as fighting off a deadly illness. Some of the most intense stress response inducers on the emotional spectrum can include: the death of a spouse, divorce, marital separation, being fired from work, retirement, health issues, sex difficulties, emotional abuse etc. We can all probably relate to having experienced some degree of stress in our life.

The good news is that our bodies are designed to tolerate stress. Our stress response system has been shaped over thousands of years and it has been perfected in order to help us survive in nature. If you've ever seen a nature documentary you will see that nature is rough and yet humans are programmed to be the most successful within the ecological pyramid. Our survival is in our DNA! We are designed perfectly with a built in system, ready and able to adapt our bodies to successfully overcome a wide range of stressful circumstances. Before we continue, I think it is important to include a bit about how the stress response plays out in the body and what happens when we experience prolonged periods of stress.

The "stress response" includes three stages: alarm (a.k.a. fight-or-flight), resistance, and exhaustion. These responses are mostly all regulated by the adrenal glands (hint: if you experience issues with losing excess weight around your belly this is often due to prolonged stress in the body which have resulted in adrenal fatigue. One of the most common symptoms of adrenal fatigue is- you guessed it- belly fat!) The first stage, "fight-or-flight", occurs at any given moment when we perceive danger. This can be a physical danger (ex: wild cat at a distance) or mental (ex: strong emotions of fear when an abusive partner walks into the house in a bad mood). This then triggers our sympathetic nervous system and the HPA axis (hypocampus/pituitary/adrenal axis) which cause the body to secrete adrenaline and other stress inducing hormones like cortisol (express cortisol promotes belly fat). During this phase, the blood moves away from the skin, and focuses on transporting blood to the heart, brain and muscles. Our digestion rapidly diminishes and our blood sugar rises. This lasts for a short period of time as it is designed to facilitate enough energy for us to run. For prolonged stress our bodies adapt to the resistance phase of our stress response.

Our resistance response allows us to remain alert and continue fighting a stressor after the first shock from our fight-or-flight response wears off. During this phase, our adrenals continue to secret cortisol. Because of this, our body will then begin to turn protein into energy in order to preserve glucose in the liver in case of an emergency and we need to run. It will also begin to retain sodium in oder to keep our blood pressure and heart beat elevated - again, just in case we need to run. This phase will be prolonged until the individual no longer perceive any danger. The length of this stage depends on each individual circumstance but it is designed to allow a person to move through an emotional crisis, perform strenuous tasks, and fight infection. Being in this stage for long periods of time can drastically effect the body because of the strain on vital organs. A person is therefor more likely to develop diabetes, high blood pressure, obesity, and cancer if stress levels are not managed.

This leads us to the final stage of the stress response- exhaustion. This can look like partial or total collapse of a body function or specific organs. During prolonged stress our hearts, blood vessels and immune systems are most drastically effected. This can cause a rippling effect of the development of other health ailments including: autoimmune diseases, hypertension, IBS, asthma, depression, menstrual irregularities, rheumatoid arthritis, cancer, ulcers etc.

Let's now direct out attention to certain life habits that can create stress in the body while also taking a look at what we can do to begin healing our body from long term stress and give our bodies the necessary tools it needs to better adapt to future life stresses.

Practical Stress Management Tools

Stress is not the bad guy here. I know we all want to point our fingers at stress but I'd caution you to take a step back for a moment. A very wise man, by the name of Hans Selye argued in his book "the stress of life" that it is not the stressor that determines our stress response but rather, it is the individuals internal reaction, which then triggers the response. I can already hear some of you saying "HOLD UP! I am not the one who did x, y, z! This happened to me!" Although it is true that unfortunate events may land on our path as we walk through life we simultaneously can choose how we perceive and react to these events. When we make a conscious decision to take responsibility over every life event that comes our way, and train our "reactionary mind", we gain the power to alter the way we view life's unfortunate events and, as a result, we can come out the other side unharmed. This differentiation is proof as to why one person can view an experience as stress while the next person may see it completely differently. The author also goes on to explain how stress is virtually impossible to avoid. We experience a degree of stress whenever high emotions are experienced (including joy) which offer us the beauty to experience the "spice of life". So it really is our perception and our ability to adapt which ultimately determines how we choose to experience stress in life.

The victim mentality

When the world seems like it is out to get you then it is critical that you address this feeling immediately. I would argue that this mentality runs rampantly in western culture today and is most likely one of the leading reasons why so many of us are stressed out and feel stuck in life. For individuals experiencing a victim mentality, it can appear as though life is happening to us and that we are victims of the system. I'd like to break the intensity of this topic for a moment and share this comedic video showcasing some of today's common woes.

Watch this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TwOGMNrFBiM&t=6s

When we experience a victim mindset we may blame others for the way our life is, we may truly think life is against us, we have trouble coping with problems in life and feel powerless against them, we approach things in life with a negative attitude, we feel attacked when someone tries to offer helpful feedback, we find it difficult to examine ourselves and make changes, we may attack others for complaining about their life and we can find comfort in feeling bad because of some sort of perceived reward. Healing a victim mentality is going to be critical when improving our outlook on life and how capable we are at managing stress. Having a victim mentality can also effect all areas of our life, from our relationships, how we express our world view, our sense of self and identity and overall well-being as an individual.

Society also pressures us in many ways to take on all the worlds problems which make us feel overwhelmed and helpless in finding any sense of resolution. We are not designed to take on the worlds issues. This has only now become a problem due to globalization and the effects that technology and social media now play in our life. Prior to this time, individuals we're concerned with what was happening within their own life, the family unit and mainly the immediate community they we're based in because we had less access to global news and events. This allowed individuals to actually find resolution because it was happening more centrally in their life. Town meetings allowed individuals to speak and vote for what they wanted to see in communities. As a result real change was able to be seen and accounted for because it happened locally. We didn't have to depend on large corporations to change there company protocols in order to see change happen. We also had much less centralization when it came to the processes which affected our day to day life. Individuals had more responsibility for their own health, wellbeing and assets which made people more responsible and accountable for their own actions. Now, we are seeing more of our responsibilities being channeled into the hands of large corporations and centralized governments and wonder why it is so hard to see change happen in our individual communities. Hands down, life was much simpler back then but even with all this being said, we all can still take small steps each day to take back the responsibility over our own well-being.

Healing a victim mentality can be challenging due to the nature of its unfoldment process. Many of us developed a victim mentality as a coping mechanism for life events. Inner child work is a key component to healing this perceived mental block. Developing compassion for ourselves and how we have dealt with life events in the past, developing deep self love, boundaries and inner strength to take personal responsibility over life's events is a key component to better stress management. It is also important to take a step back and acknowledged when we point our fingers to the external world for how we feel or why we feel we are experiencing something in life. Unless someone is pointing a gun to your head, you have full power and authority to accept, or not accept any event in life. If someone or something comes between you and your life purpose, you have the power to redirect yourself. You are not a victim of other peoples decisions! Options are endless in this world and if you have determination, and discipline you can succeed in what it is you wish to achieve. But its all on you, and you alone.

Better Time Management & Communication

The two most common stressors in peoples lives are: not having enough time in the day to accomplish everything that needs to be done and interpersonal relationships.

Time management:

By improving our time management we not only eliminate time wasters but we also find more time to allocate to the things we want to accomplish in life. Simple ways to do this is to set priorities and organize your day before it happens. Find time every morning to acknowledge your schedule and to coordinate what needs to be done that day. Write it out on paper so that you don't have to carry every through in your mind. It is best to prioritize your tasks in order of importance and to tackle the "hard" things first (when you have optimal energy). You'll also want to work on delegating certain tasks and authority to others when you can. Often times, when we live busy lives we have a very hard time depending on others. Train yourself to allow a balanced approach between doing things yourself and knowing when to delegate to others. If you'd like to learn more about optimizing your time management, I offer additional advice to my holistic health coaching clients. Be sure to check our my programs!

Improving Communication:

One of the best ways to improve interpersonal relationships is by improving communication. It is crucial to be clear about your expectations, boundaries and to practice respect for the self and others in order to experience more symbiotic relationships. Good communication starts with good listening. This is often overlooked in our culture where everyone has something to say and wants to be heard. It is important to practice active listening to ensure all parties in relationships feel heard and respected. This involves restating what the other person has said to ensure you understand exactly what they meant, waiting to speak until the other person is done speaking, not talking over somebody else and helping others become better listeners. This last one can be done by politely and sincerely asking the other person if they understood what you were communicating. A lot of communication is also done in silence so do not get anxious during long pauses. Often times, people like to process information in silence so allow space for this to occur if need be.

Avoid negative coping mechanisms

Unfortunately, healthy coping mechanisms to stress are not always taught yet, we have all developed our own ways for coping with stress wether we are aware of them or not. It is important when learning to manage stress that we identify any negative coping mechanisms and replace them with more positive coping mechanisms. Here are some examples of negative coping mechanisms and ideas to help counter balance them.

Negative: Too much television.

Positive: Regular exercise is a great tool to use to help increase energy, vitality, mental clarity, and confidence. While exercise actually creates stress in the body at first, regular exercise helps the body adapt to stress and becomes an effective stress reducing technique. People with a regular exercise routines are less likely to suffer from depression and fatigue. Depending on the type of stress you're experiencing things like kickboxing, weight lifting or yoga can drastically help expel stress and negative emotions from the body. Check out Yoga On DEMAND and begin a regular yoga practice with me for just 30$/month. Explore what is offered with every membership HERE.

Negative: Over or under eating.

Positive: Try making home cooked meals that help to nourish the body and nervous system during times of stress. Home cooking can be a fun, creative, and joyful process. I offer a ton of cooking classes and guidance to help inspire you in the kitchen. Learn more HERE. When preparing foods at home to help your body during times of stress, eliminate refined carbohydrates, eat a range of colourful foods, and increase your potassium levels with foods like bananas, lentils, potatoes, pumpkins/squashes, spinach, avocados, beet greens. Potassium greatly helps to support the adrenal glands. Try my easy butternut squash soup rich in potassium the next time you're feeling stressed and are looking for a healthy cozy meal. Get the FREE recipe HERE.

Making sure you have healthy meals at the ready can also helpful in relieving stress. You can accomplish this with weekly meal planning and preparing healthy freezer home cooked meals. Also be sure to slowly enjoy meals in a calm environment so that your digestion works optimally. Check out my article on how to perform a Mindfulness Eating Ritual. This ritual is designed to help you develop more mindfulness around meal times. Click HERE to get the article.

Negative: Dependence on chemicals (legal or illegal): drugs, alcohol, smoking or other substances like coffee which aggravate the nervous system.

Positive: Look for healthier natural remedies when you are feeling stressed or anxious. Herbal teas are an excellent place to start! I highly recommend taking a look a herbs that offer nervine & adaptogenic properties. Nevines work directly on the nervous system while adaptogens help to improve your capacity to adapt to stress in the body. A great place to start is with an adaptogenic plant medicine called Ashwagandha. If you are interested in a tailored herbal plant medicine protocol I'd like to invite you to book your Herbal Protocol Coaching Session. In this session, we will go over and discuss your current health ailments, I will take note of any medications you are taking to prevent negative side effects and I will then send you my plant medicine recommendations. Get your Herbal Protocol HERE.

Negative: Emotional outbursts.

Positive: Take a look at the impact of your emotions. Intense emotions aren't all bad. Aim for regulation, not repression. Find a safe space for you to express emotions within a private setting. Keep a journal to track what emotions you're feeling, how these emotions make you feel in the body and when you experience emotional triggers. A journaling practice will help you to identify common triggers and assist you in developing healthy coping mechanisms like breathing techniques. I offer special guided meditation and breath work techniques to my clients with my Community Forum Membership, only 10$/month. Discover how my guided meditations can help HERE. Spending time in nature can also drastically help calm the mind and emotional body. Take some time in the sun, go for a walk or sit by flowing water and imagine your emotions slowly restabilizing themselves as you observe the calm flow of water.

Negative: Feeling helpless

Positive: Positive affirmations are a great tool to help encourage concepts of self authority in your life. Inner child work is another great way to uncover potential blocks when it comes to your ability to take action and responsibility over every life event that comes your way. I offer one-on-one Holistic Health Coaching Programs designed to help clients navigate all aspects of their life in order to experience deeper healing in and better health. Check out my programs HERE.

Negative: Over spending

Positive: "Retail-therapy" often offers us a general boost in our mood by generating happy hormones like dopamine and endorphins. The excitement of something new can be revitalizing for some of us. Try discovering new skills and talents. Creativity can actually promote the secretion of dopamine making you feel more at ease. Try something like abstract painting which help to cleanse away negative emotions and increase mood. Yoga and other exercise can also be helpful.

Recap

Stress is a part of life but it is our ability to adapt to stress which determines the impact it has on our health. It is important to understand how stress looks and feels like in the body. Becoming aware of the unfoldment process of stress in the body can help us determine when we are experiencing a triggered stress response. From there we can develop healthy ways to cope with stress. Daily exercise, a balanced diet rich in potassium, vitamin C, zinc and magnesium will greatly help ensure that the body has what it needs in order to remain strong when faced with stress. Nature is also a great ally when learning to cope with stress. When we live symbiotically with nature we find it easier to flow with life's constant changing landscape. We can also prevent stress by helping to improve our time management skills and interpersonal communication. Finally, it is important to develop self-authority and self responsibility if we want to improve our outlook on life and reduce stress.

I hope that you've enjoyed learning about these practical tools to help you soothe your body, mind and spirit when faced with stress. As always, do let me know if you have any questions or if you would like to share your thoughts on the article. I'd love to hear from you.

With Love & Light,

Renelle B